Slooshy

Oh – and now I become one of those horrendously dull ‘diet’ people, measuring my life in inches and pounds..or really cm and kilos..me being of the metric persuasion. Don’t usually do diets. Don’t care that my BMI puts me in the overweight range. I’m slothful and find that black hides a multitude of sins. But maybe it’s the call of spring. Decided I was tired of a middle which I can almost rest my arms upon when upright; tired of giant peasant bosoms; tired of not being able to wear empire waist tops and dresses because I look five months pregnant. Tired of not finding pants which fit both leg and waist. But I loathe diets. Oh but I like reading about them and sometimes I even buy the books. I get enthused just looking at the cover. I always read the first few chapters which have all the science behind the diet, and then I read the heat-warming testimonials..and then I look at the menu plan…and then most times, I give up before I have started. Earlier this year, I actually started The “NEW” Atkins diet..but found it was too stressful..way too much cooking in the morning. And really too American. I mean – who eats turkey sausages? Anyway obviously the concept of eating less seems to be beyond me. I don’t think I even eat excessively because beyond a couple of kilos which fluctuate I haven’t actually put on weight for years. I’m just stuck at a point which is a good 10 kilos over what the charts say I should be. So I decided to try one of those meal replacement diets. A couple of years ago, my mum went on Celebrity Slim and dropped some weight which she has kept off, so I thought I’d give it a go…..

The concept is basically that you replace two meals with a shake made up of all sorts of goodness knows what, and have one low carb main meal and a couple of snacks throughout the day. You are not supposed to go hungry. The carb thing will be the hardest for me. I’ve always scoffed at people who go down that route. Because I ruv them…yummy scrummy bread and pasta…who could deny you?? I think I’ve been eating even more of that since I became vegetarian, so maybe that is why my stomach seems to be getting bigger even as my weight doesn’t rise.

So I started yesterday, the first day back from the long weekend. Chocolate shake in the morning. Tick. No problem. At work – a couple of cuppas and a yogurt. Not sure if yogurt is on the allowable snack list. Oh well and bleh. Feeling decidedly slooshy on the insides. Thought of another bit of liquid at lunchtime becoming less appealing. And well!! A few of them ‘would’ have to have a hankering for chinese food today wouldn’t they? Ask me if I want them to bring me back something. Oh and of course Gigi would bring back Macadamia nut shortbread from her trip to Port Douglas. Oh and she would bring in hardboiled eggs for her lunch..which made me salivate. But I didn’t yield to anyone’s chinese or macadamia nut biscuits, or salted crackers with Philadelphia cream cheese, or a sup of hardboiled eggs. I just sat in the lunchroom clutching my Vanilla shake..shaken according to instructions, pretending that I didn’t want to kill them all...them with their carbohydrates. A pox on them. Not feeling good after the shake. Dont’ feel hungry..just sick. Eat half an avocado in the afternoon and start to pick up. Have a lovely vege casserole I made over the weekend for tea…wished I had some bread to sop up the juice.

Today much better! I think the first part of yesterday consisted of too many liquidy things, so took in a hardboiled egg for the first snack, and that helped. Still felt like a goose sitting at lunch with everyone with just a shake. But today I put it in a coffee cup, so it just looked like I was having soup.

Well fingers crossed I won't be a dull diet person. I just want to find my waist this summer. But hey - no promises.   The thing I dont' like about diets is that it makes me obsess about food in a way that I usually wouldn't.  I don't usually place a value judgement on it at all..unless it's for my husband..and I'm just looking out for his ol' ticker.